Sticks and Stone and other things that hurt

So as children we were taught this little phrase to retaliate to those that picked on us: "sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words will never hurt."  Here is what happened to most kids that quipped that on the playground 1) they ended up hiding and crying the in the principals office or 2) got hurt with sticks, stones or fists.  At some point in our childhood development, probably pretty early on, we realize that sticks and stones hurt for awhile, but words smart for a long time.  While the pain from a kickball to the face eventually subsides, sometimes the wounds from someone's words last a lifetime.

Last night we sat and challenge the young adults how come to our house to pretty get fed once a week on this principle found in James 3 about controlling our tongues.  One of the resounding walkways from our discussion is that most of us are so unaware of the words we use and how we use them.  I think a lot of us would be astounded if we knew how much damage we did with what we said.

There is one point is the passage where James compares our tongues to deadly poison. While I have never given arsenic to anyone, I did kill some mice that were terrorizing my garage.  They were chewing through everything - garbage cans, kids toys, anything they could find.  They had to be dealt with and try hitting a fleeing mouse with a stick or stone was next to impossible.  So I set out some poison.  The little mice feasting on the blue pellets of the deadly cocktail, soon no more mice.  I wonder how many of us our serving deadly cocktails to those around us.  I wonder if the poison we spread through what we say might leave us with no more friends, no more spouse, no more children, no more co-workers to eat lunch with.

What are we serving others with our words?  Is it kindness, love and grace?  Or is it a deadly poison?

Question: When was a time words did more damage than sticks or stones?