The Man I Hear When I Laugh

It used to be a scary thought.  It was the one thing I did not want to be when I grew up.  That one thing was...my dad.  I am sure I don't stand alone in this world as the only rebellious son that wanted to push against the very image of who his 'ole man' was.  It's the Christopher Columbus or Neil Armstrong in us all that desires to chart our own course, go where no man has been before, set out on our own adventure.  The one thing in life we don't want to be is our dad.

To be honest, my dad is a great guy.  Hard working to a fault.  Faithful in every sense of the word -- despite his split decision on being a Reds and Cubs fan.  Conservative and generous.  He is a great guy!  Yet, as a young man, he was the one thing I did not want to be.  And maybe it is the human nature of boys to push against the grain.  Maybe it is the arrogance of youth to believe you can do it better.  But whatever it is or was, it was the one thing I was trying to avoid.

But the other day it happened and has happened more and more.  I hear my dad when I laugh.  It is a loud, short chuckle kind of laugh.  When I first noticed I nearly subconsciously turned to see if my father was in the room.  Which upon the briefest moments later I realized was next to impossible as he was hundreds of miles away.  The next time it happened I tried to fight it, I tried to laugh differently.

I think it eventually happens to all of us sons, the one thing we have spent most of our lives running from, eventually catches us.  Charles D. Pitts' DNA courses through my veins.  It is unavoidable.  So what I have learned to do is embrace it.

While there are pieces of his life that will teach where not to tread, there are also pathways he has carved that lead me to being a better man, a better husband and a better father.  For sure, we have not always seen eye to eye, but that does not mean I did not look up to him.  While he faces his own struggles, he does so with grace, humility and an honor I could learn from.

When I hear the laughter of my father in my laugh, I become thankful the man that taught me to ride on two wheels and play catch.  And I realize that possibly one day my sons, will hear me in their laughter...my hope is that they are grateful for the man I have raised them to be.

Thanks dad!